1. One who has a lot of experience with breakups and has had multiple partners and breakups, and knows a lot about heartbreak

or

2. One who has been happily with the same person for a very long time because they managed to make it work.

Which one would you rather get advice from?

Best Answer: It depends on what you’re looking for in a relationship. Listen to what each of them has to say, then decide who’s advice, if any, you want to follow.

Does anybody have a suggestion?

A.There is a book called 1,000 Questions for Couples, by Michael Webb, that is great for developing a deeper understanding of your partner.  It is great for all relationships…dating, married, and even long distance.   See a new “Question of the Day” in the sidebar of BestRomanceSecrets.com.

There are also some romantic couples games found on this page: http://bestromancesecrets.com/romantic-bath-gifts-games

Is your marriage having problems? No matter how ugly it may be, there’s still time and things you can do to improve your relationship. Here are four simple ways to help you build the best, most loving and satisfying relationship with your wife.

1. Deal with arguments differently

Every marriage and relationship has arguments, but it’s how you deal with them that’s most important. In middle school, I said ‘no’ to drugs. On my wedding day, I said ‘no’ to fighting. Nancy Reagan’s “Just Say No” anti-drug campaign was a great success. Children made a verbal pledge and took a mental stand against drugs before they were even old enough to be tempted. By the time they were introduced to drugs, they knew they could “just say no” and not feel alone. Arguing is NOT harmless. It’s habit-forming and, if it persists, is likely to cause damage that can’t be undone. Of course there are times when emotions get heated, and the natural tendency is to become very angry. I sometimes have to stop and think so I don’t say something I would be sorry for later (since when is self-control a bad thing?) Having a naturally calm personality I confess has made it easier for me to think before I speak than it is for some people. But that shouldn’t stop anyone from trying.

2. Turn gossip and negative remarks into esteem and praise

No one’s perfect. When the guys get together and the conversation turns to complaining about “what their wives do,” or wife bashing in general, refuse to join in. It shows that you respect and value your wife. As an alternative, when a “gripe session” gets going, choose to start sharing some of her good qualities. More often than not, this alone will guide the conversation into a positive direction and help your friends to also praise their wives — which in turn helps them to respect and appreciate them more too. Knowing that my wife refuses to put me down in front of friends makes me love and respect her even more.

3. Add variety to your daily life

After a period of time together, most couples get into a comfortable routine where they always do the same things.  Same dinner / movie dates, same sexual routine and same behaviors.  You can rekindle some of that magic and keep your marriage exciting by simply paying attention to these three important areas:

1.  Go on creative dates – agree to go out and do something you’ve never done before once every week, couple weeks, or month.  It doesn’t really matter what you do, but it’s important to make the effort to do this regularly. Want some ideas?  Go to a winery, museum, art gallery, carnival, the beach, or have a picnic in a park.

2.  Spice up your lovemaking – try a new position, technique or location.  Wear some nice lingerie or introduce some new toys into the bedroom.

3.  Show her you think about her – buy her a gift just to say “I love you,”
give her a nice massage, set up a scavenger hunt that shows how much you care about her with a gift at the end.

4. Tackle money issues and debts together

One of the biggest stress-causing problems facing couples today is the huge amount of debt they bring into their marriage. Not only are there more divorces, couples are calling it quits much earlier in their marriage than ever before.  Here are some ideas to get your debt and money issues under control.

1. Sit down and prioritize all aspects of your family budget together.  Only when you analyze your spending habits will you fully realize where you are wasting money.  It’s a great time to talk about your goals and dreams.

2. Realize that frivolously spending money can be a sign of disrespect for your marriage and mate.

3. If you would like a bigger diamond ring or a fancier car, ask yourself why.

4. Take a quick inventory of all the items you own but could really live without.  Consider how much you paid for them.  What if you didn’t buy those items and had all that money in savings instead?  Would it make a difference in how you view your job, your family and your future?

5.  Get educated about money.  School doesn’t teach people what it takes to really be financially free.  Read books like Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki, Missed Fortune by Douglas Andrew, and Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill to help you take a closer look at the debt-filled society we’ve all been conditioned to live in.

So there you have it.  4 ways to turn your marriage down a positive road.  No one said repairing a marriage would be easy.  It takes time, effort and persistence to build a great relationship.

Good luck.

About the Author:

Michael Webb’s latest book, “Getting Her Back… For Good” provides
you with a solid plan to get your ex-wife back, help heal your marriage and even prevent a divorce. For all the details, visit the How
to Win Her Back website.

http://BestRomanceSecrets.com
Relationship Advice, Dating Tips, Romantic Ideas

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So, I had a boyfriend for about 3 weeks.  No secret.
Today we had a fight cause I wouldn’t tell him what I was whispering into my friends ear (just a girl friend).

He just gets up and says, “Fine. Don’t tell me,” then walks a few blocks to his house till my friends caught up to him and convinces him to come back.  I was outside just chilling, till I see my 2 best friends talking and laughing with him.  I was mad so I didn’t talk to him at all for hours.  He didn’t say a word to me also.

Now, I don’t know what I should do.  Do I  want to end our relationship before something like this happens again, or talk to him tomorrow when I see him at school and work things out.  I mean, you DO learn from your mistakes.  But he’s just so rude.

Any advice…

Ok, I am dating this wonderful women who I met last year in class. We have been dating for 1 year and 2 months. I found out she likes this other guy? How should I confront her about this? Should I be worried about this? Is this a normal thing? Will this affect our relationship?

Q.  I’ve recently come out of a horrible relationship.  I’m feeling a bit low and wondering if you have any advice?

A.  Ending any relationship, even a bad one, can be hard and takes time.  There are normal stages you will go through…shock, grief, anger, and acceptance.  Many people stay in bad relationships simply because it’s easier than change.  But staying in a bad relationship is not good for anyone involved…you, your ex, children, family or friends.

Start by using this time to find yourself again, do things that make you feel good…find hobbies and activities that you enjoy, especially if it gets you out of the house and helps you meet people with similar interests.

Pamper yourself, make sure you eat healthy, meditate, get enough rest.  Spend time outside, exercise…go for a walk or a hike.  Spend time with people you like, people that can make you laugh.  All these things can help distract you from thinking about the past for a little while, and exercise and meditation produce endorphins and hormones that boost your mood levels.

This would also be a good time to occupy yourself with working on that project you’ve been putting off for a while or volunteer to help someone else…it’s hard to feel bad when you’re accomplishing goals and doing something good.

When you find yourself thinking about something that makes you feel bad, stop…you have the power to choose how you feel.  It isn’t always as easy as it sounds but it gets easier with practice.  When you catch yourself feeling bad observe how you feel (all the physical feelings in your head, your chest, your breathing, etc.), then ask yourself if those thoughts and feelings are serving you in a positive way or a negative way.  Pain comes from fighting against the way things are, when you learn to accept what is you can move on to dealing with the situation constructively…this works for anything in life from little inconveniences to major disasters.

With each relationship you learn more about what you want and what you don’t want in your next relationship.  Take time to make a list of the characteristics you want in your perfect mate, when you know what you want you will find yourself attracting what you are looking for into your life.  It also helps to take some time to learn how to communicate with the opposite sex in order to make a future relationship the best it can be.

And remember, a failed relationship only means that you just haven’t met the right person yet…they’re still out there looking for you, too!

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I really wanted to share this post about the emotions that go along with making changes in a relationship, it was written by a good friend of mine, Michael Hoffman, who is also a transformational speaker.

*********************

Breaking Unwritten Contracts When You Make Change in a Relationship

All relationships are contractual. Often these contracts are unwritten and unsaid – yet they control most of the experiences of the relationship. We are typically not consciously aware of what we have agreed to with this person. During this winter time of introspection, we may become aware that a relationship that is not working for us. We seek to change the relationship.

When we change the way that we act in a relationship, we break the existing contracts that we had with this person. The person that has the contract broken on them usually feels betrayed, hurt, or angry. The person that breaks the contract often feels guilty. These dynamics tend to happen even if the contract that you are breaking is unhealthy for you and the other person. They were likely comfortable with the way that it was. The other person will often try to convince you to return to the way that it was. They may let you know how painful and inconvenient that this new way is for them.

If this is change you really want, it is essential to allow the other person to have his or her feelings, but not get seduced or talked into returning back into the way that it was. You will likely feel guilty. They will feel hurt. When I was part of a support group that was challenging contracts, we used to welcome the guilt as a sign that we were progressing in challenging our old contracts.

You replace the old contracts with new parameters on how you want the relationship to be. Parameters give you and the other person clear signals on where you are willing and not willing to go in the relationship. You then respond to the person based on your new parameters instead of the old contracts.

Over time as new grooves get established, the parameters become the new contracts. Only this time they are consciously chosen by you – so you can have the experience that you want to have with that person.

*********************

Michael writes beautiful posts, visit his site at http://michael-hoffman.blogspot.com/ to read more of his inspirational thoughts.

www.bestromancesecrets.com
Relationship Advice, Dating Tips, Romance Ideas for Singles and Couples

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However, what men want more than a pretty face or nice body is to be ADMIRED by their partner.

The truth is most men that have affairs are CRAVING admiration.

At home, many men feel nagged and unappreciated.

At the office, they are the ‘hero’.

If a man doesn’t feel admired at home, he becomes easier prey for any woman that makes him feel respected and admired.

Understanding men is a powerful first line of defense in building a solid relationship, you will get what you want when you give them what they need.

When a woman makes her man feel admired she cloaks him in ‘affair-proof’ armor because most men would do anything not to lose her admiration.

This short video has some great tips on how to get your man to treat you right while making him feel like your hero using the Conscious Retraining Method in the Magic of Making Up manual.  No nagging involved… and for you guys reading, this works both ways.

The Magic of Making Up is usually read by people who want to get back together with their ex’s, but as you’ll hear in the video it’s also a great help to improve your relationship and prevent you from breaking up to start with.

Learning the secrets to having great relationships is an important skill you will use for the rest of your life in any relationship you have.  A great relationship brings much happiness, love, and security into your life.  Love is your reward in life.  It is well worth the time and effort to learn the valuable skills involved with romance and relationships.

Stop worrying about your partner having an affair, learn how to prevent it.  If an affair is already threatening your relationship you need to learn how to turn the situation around and repair the relationship before it gets worse…if you want to save your relationship you need a plan.

Go here to review more of the Magic of Making Up.

Visit http://www.BestRomanceSecrets.com for more relationship, dating and romance advice.

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This information was written by Bob Grant, founder of RelationshipHeadquarters.com.

Whenever I speak with a new client there is always a challenge. This challenge is that I must manage to get enough information, while at the same time giving the client something helpful. To give someone information that is truly helpful, a counselor needs to understand that person, the details of their situation and a little bit of their history.

This is not an easy thing to accomplish in the first session. However, there is one thing that I have noticed with my female clients that believe it or not nearly all of them do. Yet, they never realize they are doing it. Often I notice them doing this in the first visit, and they are surprised that I make such an issue of it. Part of the reason that I have to point their behavior out to them is that it actually comes across as unattractive to men. So what is this insight about what women do that men find unattractive?

Most women don’t receive compliments well.

Actually, a more honest statement would be that most women are terrible at receiving compliments. They don’t want others to think they are arrogant, snobby or even worse – a bitch. But in an attempt not to appear conceited, they fail to understand how they appear to a man.

When a man compliments you, he’s actually giving you something – like a flower or a gift. If you minimize his words, he feels like you are belittling his gift. If you do that enough, you’ll train him not to give to you. In effect, you’re telling him you don’t believe the nice thing he said about you. He won’t think you’re being humble. Instead, he’ll soon believe that he was mistaken to believe you’re wonderful.

So what should you do?

When a man compliments you, smile and simply say “thank you.” Oh, I realize it sounds simple, and it is. But if you begin doing this, you’ll find that you may feel very vulnerable. To receive a compliment can be unnerving. It takes practice. But from a man’s perspective, it conveys confidence and is very attractive.

Bob Grant is a Clinically trained Licensed Professional Counselor with over 20 years experience, Media Expert on Relationships and Men, and the Best-Selling Author of 4 Books:

* The Woman Men Adore -   Click Here

* How Do I Get Him Back -   Click Here

* What Husbands Can’t Resist -  Click Here

****************************************

I have read both The Women Men Adore and Find the Man of Your Dreams and I they both contain very good information.

I think The Women Men Adore and Never Want to Leave is a book every woman should read and would benefit from, it’s good for anyone looking for a new relationship or wanting to improve an existing relationship.  I have even given it to my teenage daughters to read because I want them have the information that can help them have the happiest relationships possible.

How to Find the Man of Your Dreams is great for nailing down what qualities you would like to have in your perfect partner and determining what thoughts and habits you have that might be stopping you from finding the man of your dreams.

Feel free to click on the links above to review the books in more detail and see what special bonuses are included with them.

If you have a friend who could use a little help in the romance department then please share this with them…life is too short to waste one more minute lonely or in a relationship that is anything less than a celebration of life!

www.bestromancesecrets.com
Relationship, Dating and Romance Advice for Singles and Couples

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