MEN: 4 Things You Can Do to Improve or Save Your Marriage
Saturday, April 10th, 2010
Is your marriage having problems? No matter how ugly it may be, there’s still time and things you can do to improve your relationship. Here are four simple ways to help you build the best, most loving and satisfying relationship with your wife.
1. Deal with arguments differently
Every marriage and relationship has arguments, but it’s how you deal with them that’s most important. In middle school, I said ‘no’ to drugs. On my wedding day, I said ‘no’ to fighting. Nancy Reagan’s “Just Say No” anti-drug campaign was a great success. Children made a verbal pledge and took a mental stand against drugs before they were even old enough to be tempted. By the time they were introduced to drugs, they knew they could “just say no” and not feel alone. Arguing is NOT harmless. It’s habit-forming and, if it persists, is likely to cause damage that can’t be undone. Of course there are times when emotions get heated, and the natural tendency is to become very angry. I sometimes have to stop and think so I don’t say something I would be sorry for later (since when is self-control a bad thing?) Having a naturally calm personality I confess has made it easier for me to think before I speak than it is for some people. But that shouldn’t stop anyone from trying.
2. Turn gossip and negative remarks into esteem and praise
No one’s perfect. When the guys get together and the conversation turns to complaining about “what their wives do,” or wife bashing in general, refuse to join in. It shows that you respect and value your wife. As an alternative, when a “gripe session” gets going, choose to start sharing some of her good qualities. More often than not, this alone will guide the conversation into a positive direction and help your friends to also praise their wives — which in turn helps them to respect and appreciate them more too. Knowing that my wife refuses to put me down in front of friends makes me love and respect her even more.
3. Add variety to your daily life
After a period of time together, most couples get into a comfortable routine where they always do the same things. Same dinner / movie dates, same sexual routine and same behaviors. You can rekindle some of that magic and keep your marriage exciting by simply paying attention to these three important areas:
1. Go on creative dates – agree to go out and do something you’ve never done before once every week, couple weeks, or month. It doesn’t really matter what you do, but it’s important to make the effort to do this regularly. Want some ideas? Go to a winery, museum, art gallery, carnival, the beach, or have a picnic in a park.
2. Spice up your lovemaking – try a new position, technique or location. Wear some nice lingerie or introduce some new toys into the bedroom.
3. Show her you think about her – buy her a gift just to say “I love you,”
give her a nice massage, set up a scavenger hunt that shows how much you care about her with a gift at the end.
4. Tackle money issues and debts together
One of the biggest stress-causing problems facing couples today is the huge amount of debt they bring into their marriage. Not only are there more divorces, couples are calling it quits much earlier in their marriage than ever before. Here are some ideas to get your debt and money issues under control.
1. Sit down and prioritize all aspects of your family budget together. Only when you analyze your spending habits will you fully realize where you are wasting money. It’s a great time to talk about your goals and dreams.
2. Realize that frivolously spending money can be a sign of disrespect for your marriage and mate.
3. If you would like a bigger diamond ring or a fancier car, ask yourself why.
4. Take a quick inventory of all the items you own but could really live without. Consider how much you paid for them. What if you didn’t buy those items and had all that money in savings instead? Would it make a difference in how you view your job, your family and your future?
5. Get educated about money. School doesn’t teach people what it takes to really be financially free. Read books like Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki, Missed Fortune by Douglas Andrew, and Think and Grow Rich
So there you have it. 4 ways to turn your marriage down a positive road. No one said repairing a marriage would be easy. It takes time, effort and persistence to build a great relationship.
Good luck.
About the Author:
Michael Webb’s latest book, “Getting Her Back… For Good” provides
you with a solid plan to get your ex-wife back, help heal your marriage and even prevent a divorce. For all the details, visit the How
to Win Her Back website.
http://BestRomanceSecrets.com
Relationship Advice, Dating Tips, Romantic Ideas
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